Random Story Time!
by That Was Careless
Summary: Just a random spoof oneshot me and a friend wrote. Read eet! QUICKNESS! Rated T for language and suggestive themes. Some Tadase bashing if it bugs you...


Disclaimer: Sarah and JOEY don't own Shugo Chara. =3

RANDOM STORY TIME~

* * *

"I'mma be rockin' ovah that bass treble~!" Tadase squealed.

"Mutahfather I'm awesome." Ikuto ran up to him and yelled.

"No you're not, dude. Don't lie." Utau sang.

"Do a barrel roll." Amu told the three.

"Nuh, fuck you." Nagi said, running up to them.

A random woman ran up to the 5, and told Tadase "OhEmGi! I loveee your shirt!"

"... Um, what?"

"It's so hot and sexy and AWESOME!"

Tadase looked around at the other people standing with him. "Thanks, I guess?"

"Oh, I ran over your dog."

"WHAT?! I'mma fuckin' kill you."

"I'm sorry, I didn't-"

"SILENCE. I KEEL YOUHz!"

"Oh look over there! I'm changing the subject!"

"..."

"Inconspicuously."

-Cool Transition!- (Sorry, RWJ. We had to steal this from you 'cause yer so fudging smexy.)

"I'm so tired..." Kukai complained.

Yaya held out a rag, "does this rag smell like chloroform to you?"

He sniffed it, and fell immediately asleep.

"Great job, Yaya. You killed him." Amu said as she walked in.

"He'll wake up later..." She argued.

-ANOTHER COOL TRANSITION-

"Kuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuukai!" Yaya yelled as she superflyingtacklepounce'd him. Her fat rolls were crushing him.

"Yaya. Please. Get. Off. Of. Me." he said between gasps of breath.

She rolled over, unknowingly on to the steps. She rolled right down them, making odd noises the whole way.

"UNCE. FAP. FAPPITY. ARGH."

"Yaya-chan!" Kukai yelled, running down the stairs to see if she was alright. "Are you okay?!"

She opened her eyes and sniffed him. "You smell like candy."

He rolled his eyes and walked out of the Royal Garden, stepping on her on the way out.

As soon as he got out the door, he pulled out his pimp cane and started limping like Flava-Flav. Then he got out a giant clock and put it around his neck. By then, he was on the main street. He started yelling out to random people "IESH FLAVA-FLAV, BOIIII~!"

"Souma-sempai?" Kukai heard a timid voice behind him and turned around to see none other than his ex-best friend.

"Tadase-kun." He was Kukai's EX-best friend because or an awkward moment between the two in which Tadase attempted to rape Kukai. Okay, not exactly rape, but pretty much full-frontal assault.

Kukai wondered it Tadase still had those feelings for him or if he was after Amu again.

"Talk to Amu-chan lately?" Tadase asked.

That answered his question. "Nope. I haven't." He lied.

"LIAR!" Tadase quickly gained some courage, and bitch-slapped Kukai.

Then he lost that courage and ran away.

Kukai made his way home, all the while thinking of more reasons to get a restraining order against Tadase.

-PRETTY EFFIN' COOL TRANSITION! (again?!)-

The next day, Kukai went to visit the Guardians. "Hay guize!" He said as he walked in.

Amu and Tadase were fighting, Rima and Nagi were nom-ing each other's faces off, Rikka and Yaya were eating bags of candy, and Hikaru was in the corner messing with some new gadget. When Kukai walked in, everyone except Hikaru started running in circles yelling "NOOO... BONDING MOMENTS! YOU RUINED MY BONDING MOMENTS!"

Then Amu ran up to him. "KUKAI! I hope you die of grass allergi- Oh. I just noticed you have green eyes. I kinda have a thing for green eyes... kinda... shmexai." Tadase was obviously jealous of Kukai.

He yelled, "AMU! Stop wasting your time talking to Kukai."

"Oh, right. Sorry. I kinda got distracted. I mean... green eyes."

"Tadagay; why do you care?"

"WHY DOES EVERYONE THINK I'M GAY?!"

"Amu-" Kukai began to say.

"Amu, you're a slut." Tadase interrupted him.

"Tadase, you took the words right out of my mouth."

"What?"

"Ohhh, it musta been while you were KISSINNNN MEEEEE~"

This just made Tadase even more mad.

"Hah! I KNEW YOU TWO WERE GAY! This will make for tons of slash fanfictions!"

"..."

Amu then ran over to him.

"HIKARU! I JUST NOTICED YOU HAVE BLUE EYES! I kinda have a thing for blue eyes, kind-"

Nagi interrupted her. "Shut. The hell up. You fuzzbag."

Rima looked at him. "Be nice." she said, clinging to him. "NAGI! I just noticed you have yellow eyes. I kinda have a thing for yellow eyes--"

"I am not tza'sssssssssssssz." Nagi interrupted.

"Tza'sssssssssssz?" Rima asked

"Long story!" He argued.

"Unlike this one..." She stated.

"True..."

**TEH ENDzzz**


End file.
